January 1: Boyfriend gets scheduled to work New Year's Eve. Don't get to ring in the new year together.
February 20: Best relationship ever ends on my 25th birthday.
March 17: Greatest boss I've ever had dies suddenly of a heart attack at the age of 56.
Three months, increasingly worse news.
What else could go wrong?
If this continues, by the end of the year I'll have enough material to write a country song.
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
Monday, March 15, 2010
The Games We Play
I've been thinking a lot about the 'games' that women supposedly play. You know:
-not saying what we really mean
-expecting guys to "know" what's wrong without us telling
-manipulating men to do what we want them to
-toying with them
Remember all those "annoying" things that women do?
Yeah, it occurs to me, as a woman who does precisely none of those things, that guys actually like that. But check it out, ladies: they're sneaky about it. They give it different names.
So, if they're just over a relationship, or with a girl that does these things, they call it nagging or manipulation or games.
But if they're on the lookout for a new girl, one who does all the stuff they grew to despise in the previous one, the same actions get an entirely new name.
Yeah, that's right.
It's called charm.
-not saying what we really mean
-expecting guys to "know" what's wrong without us telling
-manipulating men to do what we want them to
-toying with them
Remember all those "annoying" things that women do?
Yeah, it occurs to me, as a woman who does precisely none of those things, that guys actually like that. But check it out, ladies: they're sneaky about it. They give it different names.
So, if they're just over a relationship, or with a girl that does these things, they call it nagging or manipulation or games.
But if they're on the lookout for a new girl, one who does all the stuff they grew to despise in the previous one, the same actions get an entirely new name.
Yeah, that's right.
It's called charm.
A suggestion
If you're not already familiar with HowItShouldHaveEnded.com, I suggest you get really familiar. Like, right now.
Love Song
The basic premise here is that a German comedian composed a little two-line "I love you" song, and learned it in over 200 languages. He even made it rhyme. About halfway through he asks people to shout out languages and he sings the song in that language.
If you don't understand German, you can't really get all the talking in this video, but the individual songs are still valuable. Maybe someday I'll do subtitles to this video...
If you don't understand German, you can't really get all the talking in this video, but the individual songs are still valuable. Maybe someday I'll do subtitles to this video...
Sunday, March 14, 2010
Late Night Musings of a Depressive Chocoholic
I just spent a whole afternoon/evening with my best friend. She makes me feel great! I love our conversation, our kindredness, and how we communicate.
But now I'm alone in my room, feeling the loneliness creeping in. This is how I feel right now:
Washed-up.
Finished.
Forgotten.
Boring.
Messy.
Unwanted.
Average.
Denied.
Complicated.
Uninteresting.
Leftover.
See here's the thing: men have their neat little boxes through which they compartmentalize their lives. Relationship over? Oh, I'll just close that box.
It's not that easy for women.
Our relationships are not just a section of our lives-- they run through the entire fabric, a hot pink thread which adds to the mosaic composing who we are. Take out a relationship and you grab that thread and pull. Have you ever pulled a thread on a knit sweater? That's what it's like. The whole garment gets scrunched and disfigured just because that one piece was removed. And then you have to pull it back apart, smooth it out, fill in the gaps.
For a woman, putting your life back together and making yourself presentable after a breakup is ever so much more involved than just shutting a box and labeling it "Old Clothes".
But now I'm alone in my room, feeling the loneliness creeping in. This is how I feel right now:
Washed-up.
Finished.
Forgotten.
Boring.
Messy.
Unwanted.
Average.
Denied.
Complicated.
Uninteresting.
Leftover.
See here's the thing: men have their neat little boxes through which they compartmentalize their lives. Relationship over? Oh, I'll just close that box.
It's not that easy for women.
Our relationships are not just a section of our lives-- they run through the entire fabric, a hot pink thread which adds to the mosaic composing who we are. Take out a relationship and you grab that thread and pull. Have you ever pulled a thread on a knit sweater? That's what it's like. The whole garment gets scrunched and disfigured just because that one piece was removed. And then you have to pull it back apart, smooth it out, fill in the gaps.
For a woman, putting your life back together and making yourself presentable after a breakup is ever so much more involved than just shutting a box and labeling it "Old Clothes".
Happy Pi Day
Ah, my dear American Math Geeks,
today is 3/14, the day known to all people in America as "Pi Day".
Why not in the whole world, you ask?
Well, the rest of the world writes the date differently. They write the day before the month. So, for instance, today is 14/3/10. For the rest of the world, Pi Day can't be today, since 14/3 doesn't make any sense.
Does the rest of the world miss out on this most wonderful celebration of geekiness, you wonder? No, in fact they don't! The rest of the world, both more precise than Americans and different in their date-writing habits, assigns the day August 22nd to be Pi Day.
If you know anything about Pi, you know that the fraction which most closely gives us the magic math number is 22/7. And with their date-writing being different, the rest of the world recognizes this number to be equal to the date given above.
And so, dear friends, fret not! For the glories of Pi Day are celebrated the world over, if on a different day.
today is 3/14, the day known to all people in America as "Pi Day".
Why not in the whole world, you ask?
Well, the rest of the world writes the date differently. They write the day before the month. So, for instance, today is 14/3/10. For the rest of the world, Pi Day can't be today, since 14/3 doesn't make any sense.
Does the rest of the world miss out on this most wonderful celebration of geekiness, you wonder? No, in fact they don't! The rest of the world, both more precise than Americans and different in their date-writing habits, assigns the day August 22nd to be Pi Day.
If you know anything about Pi, you know that the fraction which most closely gives us the magic math number is 22/7. And with their date-writing being different, the rest of the world recognizes this number to be equal to the date given above.
And so, dear friends, fret not! For the glories of Pi Day are celebrated the world over, if on a different day.
Friday, March 12, 2010
My Proof
For my birthday this year, my best friend gave me one of the most thoughtful and appropriate gifts I've ever received: a yearlong membership to the Museum of Photographic Arts.
I went yesterday to change my address on the account, and decided to walk through. There's an expo right now on the definition of beauty as seen through a photographer's lens. It's a great little feature and I so much enjoyed the variety.
One photograph, however, one of the first I saw, struck me. It's by photographer Duane Michals See a small copy here:
I went yesterday to change my address on the account, and decided to walk through. There's an expo right now on the definition of beauty as seen through a photographer's lens. It's a great little feature and I so much enjoyed the variety.
One photograph, however, one of the first I saw, struck me. It's by photographer Duane Michals See a small copy here:
If you can't read the text at the bottom, this is what it says: "This photograph is my proof. There was that afternoon when things were still good between us, and she embraced me, and we were so happy. It did happen. She did love me. Look, see for yourself!"
The photograph itself is well done. It's soft, sweet, whimsical. But the text underneath adds a bittersweet note to it. We all have these moments where we doubt someone actually loved us. In those moments, when we see the physical proof that they did, it brings back all the lovely and sad memories from those times.
But along with the bitter taste of loss, comes a little hope. If at some point I was loved, if she did love him at one time, then there's the possibility that he and I can be loved and can love again. All is not lost! See the proof here! I am not unlovable!
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